Not all sunshine and roses

Raising a teenager is hard. I am very thankful for the support Jesse has given while I suddenly find myself with a kid that seems to hate me no matter what I do. His biggest issue is that I have too many rules. Kid, it wasn’t that long ago that I was a kid myself and I want way better for you. I want dances and dorm rooms and the true college experience that I missed out on. I want you to learn from your mistakes and become better than me. As hard as it is to admit it I think that the harder things get with him the more I feel like I’m losing myself and  treading water on my own. Don’t get me wrong I don’t regret my decision to raise Aiden as a young mom. He will make it in the end. He may not know I see it but I see all the good. I see the kid who wanted (and inevitably did) buy a bike for a 4 year old who only wanted a new pair of shoes for Christmas, the kid who used some of his Christmas money to buy his sister a Baby Shark book during our trip to the aquarium for my nieces 2nd birthday, the kid who took the homemade cookies he received from my mom to a homeless person who “needed them more than he did” ..things like this give me faith to know that he’ll be okay in the end..but right now I’m continuing to tread water while I’m waiting for the rainbow at the end of the storm.